Of all the beasts roaming the grizzled art-scape, the opera singer will always have a unique place in my heart.  At the surface, I sometimes feel that their self-unconscious melodrama, facial contortions, and readiness to accept nonsensical plot devices warrants as much abuse as possible.  I mean, who wouldn’t recognise their freaking wife just because she was dressed up as the maid?

That being said, I feel a certain kinship with these bizarre stage creatures.  Most of them are extremely dedicated to what they do and put a tremendous amount of energy into their careers, often making huge sacrifices in service of what they regard as their calling.  It’s a bizarre dichotomy.  Like oil and water, both sensibilities can co-exist in the same vessel and be in constant contact, informing the shape of the other and yet always remain separated by the hard and fast rules of reality.  When they get the role, get on stage, get the girl, and get the high note I feel like a proud father watching my progeny ride his two wheeler for the first time.  When, on the other hand, none of those things happen it’s a very different feeling:

 

I don’t know who the singer is in the above clip but it’s an aria from Verdi’s Aida.  The internet is great for many things.  One of the things I like best about it is that their is always someone out there more sadistic than you with far more time on their hands.  Observe the product of one of these gentle geniuses:

 

And if you’re like me and want to have this voice crack as your cellphone’s ringtone, here are the download links:

 

Epic tenor fail…. for your cell phone

 

 

Epic tenor fail…. for your cell phone

 

 

 

 

 

If you enjoyed reading this post, please consider subscribing!